Endless Cycle
by Songs-of-the-River
Summary: Gabriel confronts Cecily about her feelings for Jem.


"Hello, Jem!"

Gabriel Lightwood whipped his head around, a scowl already forming on his face. Sure enough, it was Cecily Herondale who had spoken. She was now smiling at Jem Carstairs, who was standing in the doorway, and Gabriel imagined that if he moved closer, he'd be able to see the adoring look in her eyes that always appeared when Jem was near. His frown deepened and jealousy bubbled in the pit of his stomach.

"Cecily," Jem said with a polite nod. But soon he was looking past her and towards Tessa Gray, his fiancée, who was next to Gabriel. Gideon and Sophie weren't there that day, so Gabriel had been training Tessa and Cecily on his own. Cecily had wandered off while Gabriel was helping Tessa, and Jem had come in as she was examining the weapons rack by the door.

Gabriel noticed Cecily's smile fade slightly as Jem focused his attention on Tessa. "Charlotte wants to speak to you, Tessa, and she asked me to find you. I'm not sure what she wants, but it didn't seem too serious, so I wouldn't worry."

"All right. Do you mind?" Tessa asked, turning to Gabriel.

"No, go ahead," Gabriel replied, quickly wiping the scowl off his face and schooling his features into a neutral expression.

Tessa crossed to the other side of the room and headed out the door. Jem gave a quick smile before following her and leaving Gabriel and Cecily alone in the training room.

Cecily was still gazing at the place where Jem had been standing a few seconds ago, her face a mixture of unhappiness and disappointment. What an interesting situation they were both in, Gabriel mused. He cared for Cecily, who would never return his feelings because she wanted Jem. And Jem would never return Cecily's feelings because he loved Tessa. It was an endless cycle.

Suddenly, before he could stop himself, Gabriel found himself saying, "It's useless, you know."

"What is?" Cecily asked, finally turning to face him. There was a slight challenge in her voice, as though she was daring him to continue.

Gabriel had never been one to ignore a challenge. "You and Jem. I know how you feel about him, and I'm telling you it's useless."

Cecily looked both shocked and angry. "I beg your pardon?"

"Stop pretending," Gabriel said bitterly, and he felt all the things he'd been thinking and feeling for the past few months coming to the surface. "It's written all over your face every time he's in the room. It's so _obvious, _Cecily. And he is never going to think that way about you because he loves Tessa more than anything else in the entire world, and nothing is going to change that. To him, you're nothing but his parabatai's little sister."

"I am perfectly aware of all that, thank you," Cecily said icily, fixing him with a fierce glare. "I don't need _you _to make me feel even worse than I already do. And why do you even care so much, anyway? You hate my brother, so why shouldn't you hate me, too? Why are you sparing a thought for my well-being?"

"Because I love you!" Gabriel blurted out. He regretted it the second the words left of his mouth. She was going to kill him.

Cecily's face paled and she stared at him with her mouth slightly open. _"What did you say?"_

"You heard me," Gabriel said shortly. "I'm not going to say it again."

He finally met her gaze. Her wide, blue eyes were filled with shock. Those were what Gabriel had first noticed about her. They were so much like her brother's, but so different at the same time. Where Gabriel had never seen anything but malice and mockery in Will's eyes, Cecily's always had some sort of innocence that he could never quite put his finger on. Everything else about Cecily was always so strong and defiant that Gabriel had always found the vulnerability in her eyes quite endearing.

There was a long, tense pause. "What do you want me to say?" Cecily said finally.

Gabriel felt a sort of hollow hopelessness spread through him. He knew it was foolish, but he'd held out hope that maybe Cecily did feel something for him. Clearly, he was wrong. "Nothing. Never mind. I just shouldn't have said anything."

Without another word, Gabriel spun on his heel and stalked out of the training room. He faintly heard Cecily saying, "Gabriel, wait!" He ignored her.

Once again, Cecily found herself staring at an empty doorway. "I think maybe I could have felt the same way for you, one day," she said softly to the deserted room.

* * *

**Just a quick little oneshot I thought of :) Let me know what you think!**


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